Life's Little Lessons

Life's what happens while we're busy making plans!

2010-04-21T03:33:00.000-07:00

This past week has really made me think about how much we take for granted. The chaos caused by one little volcano has been an incredible lesson in human expectations and adds more weight to the saying 'life is what happens while we're busy making plans'.

The closure of our air-space affected so many people's lives, both directly and indirectly, and highlighted the need to be flexible and prepared to react to an ever-changing world. Planning is good, but being prepared for the unexpected is even more important during turbulent times.

Did you notice the different attitudes of the people interviewed on TV? Some were angry and waiting to be rescued, but others told amazing stories of resilience and determination to get home in spite of the difficulties they faced. They chose to get themselves out of a mess rather than waiting for someone else to do it for them and they did it by focusing on the solution rather than the problem.

It's always the same really - you can't change what life throws at you but you can change the way you react to it.

Branding - What are you trying to say?

2010-02-04T08:29:00.000-08:00

I had a very interesting conversation yesterday. It was one of those moments where I became really clear about my personal philosophy and how it related to my business principles.

It all began with a very simple question - someone asked me "what's the secret of your success?" I had to think long and hard before responding and was very aware that my answer would be critical to the next phase of my business because I couldn't move forward without knowing what had got me here in the first place.

Had I done something very clever or unusual - something that no-one else had thought of? Had I worked harder or smarter than other coaches? I was really struggling to understand exactly what had happened along the way. I know I started out with passion and determination but how have I ended up as a successful performance coach when I haven't come from a corporate background and I don't feel like an 'executive coach'?

After a great deal of thought I have to say that my answer was neither clever nor earth-shattering. It's quite simple. I have just been doing what I believe in - coaching people, pure and simple. People are just people, wherever they work and whoever they are. I'm not swayed by title or position but I have to get behind the corporate mask before the work can really begin.

As I'm in the process of expanding my business, that question has been really valuable and I would recommend it to anyone who is seeking clarity around their personal or business brand.

Interestingly the person who asked the question is an amazing coach with a wealth of experience in brand strategy and the best news is that he will soon be a valuable member of my new team - thanks Geoff!

It's all about people

2009-12-08T02:35:00.000-08:00

The great thing about this recession is that organisations are beginning to realise that success depends upon people. As a Business Coach my role is to develop people in order to develop businesses, particularly when headcounts are being seriously reduced. The winners are always going to be the ones who engage their employees by getting them sufficiently motivated to take ownership of their part of the company's success.

I hear so many complaints about managers micro-managing their people and ruling by fear - yet being surprised when the results don't come up to expectations. Surely it makes more sense to empower people to get on with what they do best whilst offering them all the tools and support they need?

I'm pleased to say that I have never been busier because the most successful businesses are recognising the need to invest in their key people, developing the talent they already have. It's a bit like bringing up children - if you continually do everything for them they will never learn to do it for themselves, but if you show them how to do it and encourage them to practice their new behaviours they will soon be able to do it all on their own.

My daughter-in-law is a prime example of how it works. She takes her 4-year-old daughter to the supermarket and shows her how to scan the items in her basket, then allows her to do it herself. Of course she's made some mistakes along the way but has learned from those mistakes and is now fully proficient at checking out her shopping all on her own. Staff and shoppers have been amazed at the child's ability but all that was required to give her the skills was a little bit of time and patience. Of course I like to think that my grandaughter is particularly brilliant but I have to concede that her mother has simply given her the tools and support that she needed!
Perhaps personal development is simply child's play after all.

Confidence - is it without or within?

2009-11-06T04:30:00.000-08:00

I've just had a very interesting conversation with someone who has, for 50 years, been looking outside himself for approval. He was brought up believing that he shouldn't expect too much but through sheer determination and necessity has found himself in a senior position in a successful organisation, surpassing everyone's expectations of his ability.

Interestingly, until recently, he was suffering from 'Imposter Syndrome', waiting to be caught out because he didn't feel he deserved to be sitting around the board table with his peers. For years he allowed his self-limiting beliefs to colour his judgement and hold him back from achieving even greater things.

Today however he's realised that confidence is something he carries within himself, not something he gets from other people and now feels empowered and self-dependent. He finally trusts his own judgement and is free to be honest and authentic. He still appreciates it when the boss confirms he's doing a good job - but he's not reliant on his feedback because he knows it already. It's been like a door opening and he's now ready to walk through it and see how far he can go.

It's amazing what happens when you get out of your own way, don't you think?

More food for thought..................................

Watch a Master at Work

2009-10-26T07:57:00.000-07:00

One of my clients was recently concerned about her defensiveness at work. She's worked incredibly hard and become very successful but still feels the need to prove herself at every opportunity. The behaviour that has got her so far is now in danger of getting in her way and needs to be changed.

I asked her if she knew anyone who she really admired - someone who has achieved great things without the need for external validation. She had no problem finding a suitable role model and went off to have a conversation with him to see what she needed to change in order to be more like him.

The lesson here? If you want to be the best, learn from a master. Watch great leaders and ask yourself, "how do they do that?"

Think of all the people you admire and work out exactly what it is that you would like to learn from them. If it's confidence you're looking for, find a confident person and watch what they do - ask yourself "How do they look and sound? What are they doing differently?"

If it's listening skills you want to improve, find a good listener and ask yourself the same questions.

Why bother re-inventing the wheel when the answers are all around you? Try it out and let me know what you think.

At Last - A Bit of Sense

2009-10-21T01:14:00.000-07:00

I was scanning the Daily Telegraph this morning and happened across a fashion article about Sir Paul Smith. According to Celia Walden he is Britain's most successful designer and his brand has doubled its turnover in the past five years, delivering a 15 per cent rise in profits to £150 million in 2008.

The interesting part of this story (apart from being an amazing success story in the midst of a recession) is Sir Paul's attitude to the fashion industry. He admits that he "prefers the creative process of designing and selling clothes to the idea of putting on a poncey fashion show" and describes the process as "pure, self-indulgent theatre - providing lesser designers with their 15 minutes of fame".

Here is a perfect example of someone who believes in himself enough to stand apart from the crowd and allow his talent and vision to speak for itself. You may be thinking that it's easy for him to say all this now that he's so successful - but perhaps it was precisely this attitude that made him so successful?

The lesson here is about developing an inner strength, fuelled by your values and beliefs (rather than superficial status and ego), as a way of navigating yourself to the top of your game. Perhaps the key is to learn from a master and don't worry too much about what everyone else is doing.

My first lesson

2009-10-19T08:22:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my new blog - I'm not quite sure what I'm going to be saying yet but I've decided it's time to leave my old newsletter format behind and embrace a new way of working. My life is moving on at such a pace that I've recently found myself resisting the one thing that I spend my life helping everyone else with - change! It's a comfort zone thing and I know that it's what we cling onto when our boat begins to rock - it's also the thing that stops us from exploring new avenues.

Like I said, the destination of this blog is currently unknown but at least I've begun the journey and I'm so happy that you have chosen to join me. What's my first lesson? If you always do what you've always done then you'll always get what you've always got - so let's dip our toes in the water, try out something new and see where it takes us.

Till next time....................